Theme #5: Leading in imperfect systems

Earlier this year, I started sharing some of the themes that keep emerging in my coaching conversations with leaders.

Theme #5 is about leading in imperfect systems.

Throughout this series, I’ve explored some of the inner experience of leadership — from what it means to lead in alignment with who we are, to feeling like an imposter, the pressure to hold it all together and the expectations we place on ourselves.

Last month, when I wrote about boundaries, I began to explore more explicitly the interplay between the individual and the environment around them. Because how we lead isn’t shaped by us alone. Culture, workload, expectations and power all play a part.

This month feels like the next step in that conversation.

What happens when the way we want to lead meets the realities of the system we are leading within?

Competing priorities. Commercial pressures. Limited resources. Client demands. Decisions made elsewhere. Processes that don’t quite work. And sometimes decisions that aren’t the ones we would have made ourselves.

So how do we continue to lead in alignment with who we are when the system around us isn’t perfect?

Imperfect doesn’t necessarily mean incompatible

I think there is an important distinction here.

Ideally, we work for an organisation whose values broadly align with our own.

That doesn’t mean agreeing with every decision or feeling comfortable with every situation. Organisations are complex. There are competing stakeholder needs, commercial realities and difficult choices. There will inevitably be times when we would have chosen differently.

But there is a difference between experiencing tension with particular decisions and repeatedly being expected to behave in ways that conflict with something fundamental to us.

Imperfect doesn’t necessarily mean incompatible.

And perhaps part of leadership is learning to navigate that imperfection without either losing sight of who we are or expecting the organisation always to operate exactly as we would choose.

The system matters

Sometimes the environment really does make good leadership harder.

Deloitte’s 2025 Well-being at Work Survey found that 66% of managers experienced at least one organisational barrier preventing them from doing more to support their people’s wellbeing. These included rigid scheduling requirements, being too busy with critical work and an unsupportive workplace culture.

Research within professional services tells a similar story. A study of two consulting firms found that people’s ability to manage work and life was shaped not simply by individual choices, but by factors including project design, resourcing, client and partner support, organisational structures and fee-billing practices.

Acknowledging that isn’t about blaming the system or removing individual responsibility.

It’s about recognising the context in which leadership happens.

So what is mine to own?

This, for me, is where it gets interesting.

There are things within an organisation that we can control, things we can influence and things we simply cannot change.

The challenge is working out the difference — and then taking responsibility for what is ours.

If compassion matters to me, I may not be able to prevent a difficult organisational decision, but I can influence how I communicate it and how people experience me while I do.

If fairness matters, I may not control the outcome, but I can ask questions, challenge assumptions and use whatever influence I have before a decision is made.

And sometimes I may challenge strongly and still not get the outcome I wanted.

At that point, leadership may mean taking ownership of the situation rather than distancing myself from it or blaming someone further up the organisation.

That isn’t necessarily compromising who we are.

Sometimes it’s part of the responsibility we accept when we lead.

Finding our agency

Perhaps, then, there are some useful questions to ask ourselves when we find ourselves frustrated by the system around us:

What is happening here that I genuinely cannot control?

Where do I have influence?

What is mine to take responsibility for?

And how do I choose to lead from here?

Sometimes our agency lies in challenging something.

Sometimes it lies in changing the experience of the people around us.

Sometimes it lies in accepting a decision and leading through it well.

And sometimes the tension between what an organisation asks of us and what matters fundamentally to us becomes so persistent that we have to ask a bigger question:

Is this still the right organisation for me?

No organisation will be perfect. Nor will we agree with every decision made within one.

Perhaps the goal isn’t to find a perfect system.

It’s to find one that aligns sufficiently with who we are — and then take responsibility for how we choose to lead within it.

Research: Deloitte, 2025 Well-being at Work Survey.

Noury, L., Gand, S. & Sardas, J-C., Tackling the work-life balance challenge in professional service firms: The impact of projects, organizing, and service characteristics, Journal of Professions and Organization.